Thursday, June 11, 2015

My Lower Back Really Hurt!!! Energy, Emotions, & Exercise…what was really behind all of this…what truly had my back?


Two days ago I hurt my back during one of my weekly runs.  It really hurt!  It hurt so much that I had to take a day of rest and slow down.  This was a good thing.  The funny thing is that I had been struggling and straining and pushing myself to do more because of what I was taking in from the outside.  What does this mean?  I had been taking on other people’s perceptions of me and had been trying to live up to all of that and more.  I really felt the struggle and even had more of a difficult time getting up and following through with my workouts.  Yes, it could be because I am beginning to train harder for the upcoming marathon in the fall.  This would be the old way of thinking our way through problems.  We tend to do this you know.  We think it is because of something that we did; maybe I pulled weeds and was bent over for too long or maybe I moved in a certain way and it strained my back or maybe I just did not stretch enough.  No, I am here to tell you that in order to get to the roots of issues and physical ailments we have we need to begin to think of the emotions behind what is truly going on.  Every pain has a story and every pain has an emotion behind it.  Every pain has a reason… and it ain’t because we are getting too old, or my knees are worn out, or because of the any number of reasons there are out there to believe it is because of something else.  It is time for us all to begin to own our energy.  Own what is going on within you and all around you.  Ask yourself, “How did I create this story and why did I create this? What is serving me out of this?  Why am I doing this?”  There is always a reason, there is always something that we learned or was passed down from generation to generation that we sub consciously believe that causes a pain or calls our attention to something that doesn’t feel so good within ourselves.  We have the power to create all of anything and everything.  Once we get to the roots of what is causing the limitations that had such a hold on us in the first place…once we understand through awareness what we keep doing to ourselves over and over again…then we can set ourselves free.  All we have to do is ask for help, use our awareness to get to the root, with gratitude release and let go and humbly say thank you.  This is key.  If all of us did this, if all of us just owned up to our perceptions and realized that which doesn’t feel good is just a calling to know who you really are…which is perfect in every way… except we don’t completely believe this…there would be no issues.  Then, once we realize all of this there would be no reasons to ever resist or confront or argue or gander with another being.  All of life would be diffused and there would only be the piece de resistance that I speak of over and over again.  But then our ego minds may get board and question over and over again and create more instances to question and then our hearts would take over again and again and show our minds that this really was never our truth in the first place.  This is really, truly how I believe life has been created.  I believe we all have opportunities to live our truth every day.  Through awareness we either choose to do this or we choose not to.  It is completely up to us.  We can do the same things over and over again and expect things to be different or we can be the difference. 

Now…back to why my back hurt…

What really happened went like this for me… I was straining in my workouts because my life felt strained.  I felt this enormous weight that I had to produce, I had to succeed in my life and I was rushing to get there.  What I didn’t realize is that I had a hidden belief that I would not be able to succeed.   I honestly believed that I have to struggle to make it in this world.  I honestly believed that we don’t succeed.  I believed that I had incredible wisdom to share but no one would be there to hear me.  Or if they did it would be a strain for me to reach them.  My lower back felt like a slow aching pain that would not go away.  Every time I would extend my back, go into extension, it would ache more.  Aha!  I thought, I am afraid to extend myself into the world…to reach more and more people because they will not hear me and they will reject me.  I am afraid to extend myself and go forward and be seen and heard.  I am afraid to extend and be more of me, who really isn’t me at all…it is an extension of me that is all connected to the unlimited supply of Source in the first place.  I was afraid to go fully where I have not gone before.  I was afraid to release the dull achy strain that has been the base of my subconscious thoughts my entire life and probably even more times before this lifetime.  This was a huge pattern I had literally run into.  So what did I do?  I worked with this for a day.  I slowed down and I worked with my thoughts and asked for help.  I asked for forgiveness around all of this.  I asked for help in any and every which way over and over again. I did what I do in sessions with clients.  I brought awareness to the situation, asked for forgiveness, and released it to the universe.  With gratitude, I thanked my higher self for bringing this to my awareness and showing me what was truly holding me back all along, myself, and I let it go.  I worked with this for a day and I asked for more help when I went to bed that night.  When I awoke the next morning, my back still ached a bit… so what did I do… I put one foot in front of the other and ran it out.  I went for a 5-mile run and decided that as the issues came up I would just allow them to go.  And that is what they did.  My back worked itself out because I completely believe that something more powerful than me has got my back all along.  Now I can see that I am fully supported at all times and the world supports me.  There are no more subconscious beliefs that keep creeping up behind me…I can give it up and allow the opportunities to continue to come to me instead of straining to make things happen and make myself go forward.  I accept and I receive. 

Are you getting the feel for how it works?  There are many layers to this and many ways to look at this and many reasons why… but it all starts with what is going on from within…what we feel.  The Energy never dies, it is only transformed.  The Emotions behind the Energy that was keeping me from Exercising my highest self was caught up in hidden fears that I was still holding onto.  Once I put my attention on it and allowed it to speak it could be released and transformed into new Energy that directed my Emotions to a place of love and trust that brought in new patterns and experiences that I could now Exercise. 

Go forth my friends, extend yourselves, and set your expectations high!  The universe has our backs…

It is that simple, it is simply that simple.
Namaste my friends.

All my love and more,

Jennifer   

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