Sunday, May 31, 2015

Running 13.1 Miles for my Dad and Myself

I sit here in my car right now.   Ready, listening to some tunes to help me get ready for my run that I am about to do in an hour.  Why am I writing at this time?  Well, I actually have nothing else to do right now except wait for start time.  Really… there is nothing for me to do…and I also made myself a promise that I would use the energy of this run to finally dispel any left over energy within my body that has been from my past.  It has been 2 weeks since my Dad was here visiting with my family.  As you know, I have not seen him in 27 years.  I write about his trip to our home extensively in my book.  In brief, it was a blessing.  It also brought up some amazing things about myself that I had no idea I had inherited from my Dad and also some very real insecurities were revealed to me that I had been hanging onto since I was a little girl.  When I was writing this small blog just now I began writing that it had been “2 weeks since my dad left”…I realized that I am still holding onto a piece of myself that believes that my Dad left me again and will continue to not show up in my life.  So, instantaneously I decided to delete that portion of my writing and start with “It has been two weeks since my Dad visited our family”.  Do you see how this works?  Words are amazing.  They directly lead to our thoughts and the patterns we carry and hence create over and over in our lives.  Today, on my 13.1 mile run I plan to tune into many of the things that no longer serve my purpose and continue to release the layers that no longer serve my life.  I have many… don’t we all?  Over the years, I used running to ‘run away’ from my fears.  To prove something to myself… whatever it was that I needed to prove…’that I was worthy, that I could do something, that I was good enough’…what ever it was, I ran away.  The last couple of years (since a house fire and many other significant events), I have used running as the experience that it is for me…a repetitive motion of breathing and movement that stimulates every energy center in your body, brings up ‘crap’ that we all need to release, and allows us to release and no longer hold it on anymore.  Every time I have an ache in my body while I run, I ask myself why and where this is coming from, I receive the insight and then I give it up to the universe.  I thank my body for telling me what I do not need anymore and then I give it away.  I do not need to live that way anymore.  I do not need to live with aches and pains that are either emotional or physical.  Our bodies speak to us and tell us what is wrong all the time.  I believe it is our job to tune into these clues and allow them to help us heal ourselves.  This is an opportunity for me to cleanse myself over and over again.  13.1 miles of shear healing and bliss.  Today,  I have some patterns of the past, I have some issues that I am currently dealing with at home (don’t we all?), and I just simply want to enjoy the ride.  I am hydrated, peaceful and in the knowing that all is well.  I may not be fast, but I am steady and strong.  After all, wasn’t it the tortoise who won the race in the end?  Here I am, with many ‘hares’ ready to run… welcoming myself home to the tortoise that I am.

Oh…and of course there is always the famous quote…”Run Forest Run!”  Yep, this is me today.

Namasté friends.



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