This is a small sample of the book I have completed about my mom and I. My mom left the Earth on Nov. 8, 1988. In this book my mom helped me heal my past. We are speaking together on Mother's Day 2015 through my writing. Here it is...
Ch. 11
5/10/15 morning
Mother’s Day
Jen: GOOD MORNING Mom,
Happy Mother’s Day. This feels almost
like a cliché. What has Mother’s Day become? Is it really not just a Hallmark tradition
that began as a marketing scheme? I do
not know but I felt this need to connect with you again this morning. Is it about Mother’s Day or is it about the
cleansing and clearing that is going on in our lives. I have to say that I do feel better than I
have ever felt in my life. I am
surrounded by things to be grateful for all the time. It is truly amazing how my life has radically
changed over that past couple of weeks.
Mom: Good morning
sweetheart. Happy Mother’s Day to you. Today is a very special day despite all the
commercialism of it all. I am not sure
of the roots of this holiday but just enjoy it for what it is…a fantastic
opportunity to enjoy your family. I
remember when you were little how you used to bring me flowers and all sorts of
treasures from your bike rides outside.
I remember all the pots and flowers you made me at school and brought home to me. It was always so
special and I loved every moment.
Treasure these times with you children.
They are truly special.
J: I remember that
too. I used to pick irises that were
growing randomly on a hill in our neighborhood and bring them home to you. I used to pick dandelions and I used to pick
little buttercup flowers. I remember
instantly thinking of you when I saw these things and feeling like I had to
bring these home to you out of shear love and joy.
M: It was a very
special time. I also remember you
sitting in our front yard yelling out to me to come to the window and serenading me with the song from Annie, “Maybe.”
You sang and sang and sang with no hesitation and no cares in the world
if anyone heard you. I loved that about
you.
J: I remember that
too. I remember making up roller skating
dances and recitals with my friends and putting on shows for the neighborhood
to watch. I remember inviting friends
and parents to come and watch. It was a
lot of fun.
M: I am sorry I never
came to those but we can make up a story again that I did come to them and how
much fun I had watching you?
J: I already see the
story in my mind. You are sitting there
enjoying the show. You are in the second
row and you have a huge smile on your face.
You look so pretty and I love that you are there. It makes me feel so proud and happy that I
have you supporting me and it makes me want to do more of these types of things
knowing that you are at my side.
M: I always wanted
this for you my dear. Allow this to
translate to your life in several ways.
First, allow the energy that you are receiving from replacing a memory
with a happy one such as this one to feed your current life today with positive
energy. This is what you are doing when
you tell many of your clients that you see to ‘flip’ the memory or to ‘flip’
the way they think about something. Take
the new memory that you just made up, feel the positive vibrations that you are
receiving from this type of support and encouragement, and then integrate them
into your current life.
J: Yes, I feel myself
doing this again and again. I feel how a
memory comes and I wish it were different.
I really feel that I would have loved for you to be there more for
me. I insert you in there and how you look
and everything and then I just feel what it would feel like to have you there
and how it actually changes how I feel about myself. It is rather easy to do, are you helping me?
M: Jennifer, when you
live over in this realm you can create anything you like out of love. There is no resistance to doing this, it is
the ‘piece de resistance’ that you spoke about with your client yesterday. There is nothing I cannot facilitate over
here out of love and as long as I have your permission.
J: Are you saying
that all we have to do is ask?
M: Yes, my dear. As soon as you began opening your heart, feeling
me, and communicating with me you gave me permission to help you. Until that moment, all I could do is wait and
send you love. Now, that we are
communicating and you are asking for my help on a daily basis we can create
together. I am really and truly over
here experiencing your recital. I am
truly sitting in the second row, I have brown hair and soft white skin, hazel
eyes, and I am wearing jeans and flower shear shirt. You have on roller skates that are purple
with mice printed on them and you are tying them tighter to get ready for your
show. You also have rainbow leg warmers
scrunched down below your knees, jeans, and a yellow/orange shirt on. You are smiling with pigtails in your hair.
J: I see this
mom. I see you and I see me. I am very excited and we are looking at each other
very connected. As I look away I feel so
strong and powerful and that this is going to be a fantastic show.
M: And it is. You did a marvelous job. I saw you do twists and turns by yourself and
with your partners Laverne and Amy that I have never seen you do before! It was really quite lovely.
J: I see all of this
mom. Thank you. It gives me confidence and the reassurance to
go out and want to do more in the world today knowing that I have your support
and that essentially with a bit of creative healing from the both of us we have
always had this together.
M: Yes, we are
planting new seeds for you and new seeds for your family at the same time. Do you see how this helps them?
J: Definitely. I see myself making everyday changes in my
life of 2015 just by what I see that I needed as a child. I can be there for Eleanor and encourage her
to have friends over to play with more often.
I can encourage her to put on shows and plays with her friends to build
her confidence. I can encourage her to
do the things that I did and more knowing that it will help her. Most importantly I can be there for her helping
on the side and in the audience of performances. I can be there for her in many, many ways that
I did not understand before. It makes my
heart feel good to know this. I can also
do this for Aiden and Ethan as well. I
can do many of the same things for Aiden.
Especially now and for the next year, as he shifts and turns and begins
transforming into puberty. Ethan, I have
been there for in so many ways. I can
see him needing me at times but those experiences begin to be fewer now. Mom, I have more that I need to share with
you.
M: Yes my dear….
J: Mom, I had a dream
last night of a storm. I was with my
family and we were playing outside. Andy
Ethan, Aiden, and Eleanor were all there.
Even Aiden’s friend, Bryan and his sister, were there too. Olive and some other dogs were playing
together outside. We were in a field and
there were some telephone wires around.
Then soon into the dream there was a tornado siren. A huge storm was coming and we had to find
shelter. We could see it coming and it
felt like we spent many moments watching it come. It almost seemed like the storm was taking
such a long time to reach us so we took our time going for shelter and casually collected
our things. Andy,
Ethan, Aiden, and I all went in our house with Bryan and his sister and our dog
Olive. We ended up staying inside until
the storm came to us. What was different
about this storm was that we were in a room with windows. We simply pulled the shades and all sat back
together near a wall. We held onto each
other and just waited as the storm came through. Many of the dogs that Olive was playing with
were still outside running around. There
was nothing we could do about them but stay inside. All of a sudden the storm became very
intense. Everyone gripped each other and
stayed where they were. We were frozen
in fear. All at once, the storm became
incredibly powerful. Whatever remained
outside was swept away. It felt like an
incredibly huge clearing outside. The
rain poured, the lightening furiously lit up the sky and the thunder roared. In an instant it felt like everything that
was outside was gone and we were the only ones around. We were the only
beings on Earth that remained.
Everything that was outside of us was completely gone, perished. Then I felt myself present today and within
the dream at the same time. I felt
myself lying in my bed but still dreaming and encapsulated in that moment. Moments later I began to see incredibly
strong purple and gold energy all around me and it became incredibly bright
within my dream and within the room where I lay. Suddenly, there was a flash of light and a
boom of what sounded like thunder. Just
like that the energy left instantaneously.
I had this remarkable feeling that I had just received an energy
clearing. I just lay there in bed
questioning what I had just experienced.
It felt like myself and my entire family received this. It felt incredibly real. Now, today, it feels like I am waking up to a
new start and a new beginning in life. It
feels like our slates, my life slate has been wiped clean. I feel clean, clear, and refreshed.
M: Trust what you are
feeling Jennifer. What did you ask for
before going to sleep last night?
J: Well, I remember
asking for a realignment of my family and I.
I remember asking for anything leftover that kept us from living our
soul’s mission and our lives happy and healthy together to be wiped away! Now I do remember this!
M: Take this in my
dear. It was a gift. A beautiful gift. Take it in as an actual cleansing and
clearing for all of you and begin your day with this new heart & mindset
that this is exactly what happened. You
may have doubts that this isn’t so and that this is not what happened but
essentially this is just your personality coming in trying to confuse you and
make sense of it all. The personality
will try to go back to old ways. Just
peacefully tell this part of you that it is May 10, 2015 and you are starting
over completely whole, healed, and transformed.
Watch as you do this your family begins to do this as well.
J: OK. I understand and feel this in my heart. People are beginning to wake up now so I get
to go practice all of this. I have a
sense of excitement in my heart and delightfulness for this day. It is a very different feeling that I have
never felt before. I am actually excited
to create my world today with everyone around me!
M: Take it in Jennifer this is how life is supposed to
be. You get to experience what I
experience over here. We just forget
that we can do this. It is really that
simple. Once you peel back the layers
that are not of you and never were, you can do anything!
J: I feel this
mom. It is like the information that I
received from Kat’s son, David, yesterday when I was doing readings for
people. (I was giving intuitive readings
during an event at a yoga studio. A woman had her son there.) David, a 6-7 year old boy seemed incredibly clear and full of love. He was
a delightful soul that simply had no attachments of any kind and was living his life freely through his heart without
any doubts. He seemed fully connected and self assured in his every being. He was so clear and without any 'stuff' that has been layered upon his heart. He was
crystal clear and creating in every moment. There was no fear stopping him or
holding him back. It seems as if his
life is about showing people that this is how we are supposed to be. Clear of anything and everything, not allowing
the world to pass judgment on us and creating every moment with what we want it to
be.
M: Yes my dear, he is
a great example of what the new children coming in are all about. They are about connecting with others without
fear and having this internal unshakable knowing that they are always right
where they are supposed to be no matter what.
Nothing ever gets in their way because they know they are always
connected in all ways.
J: This is what I
wish to live out and be this year.
M: This is what you already are my dear. (End
session this morning)
